So I forgot my Gym bag today

I am a former gym rat. I USED to workout 6 times a week Monday - Saturday. I say former because I am now softer than hot air dryed rabbit nuts. A back/neck injury, marriage and kids kept me out of the gym for 3 years. So stuck on swole (SOS) as I am I have recommitted myself to the gym and eating "better." Having forgotten my bag this morning I decided to go back home get my bag and go to the gym. Well due to the rain, shitty maryland drivers and one pennsylvania driver I took too long to go to the gym. I will do a 2 a day tomorrow to "make-up." PROBABLY. So since this has turned into a cheat day I was going to get some fast food. I got the Indiana Jones whopper. Do not make this mistake. It tasted like yak ass with habenero sauce, smothered in gunpowder. 1st bite I was like hmm that is an interesting blend of flavors, let me try to swallow it might get better. 2nd bite hmm that burns a bit wash it down with some diet coke. Is that SMOKE? 3rd bite.... CALL THE MORTICIAN. I would rather eat Indiana Jones' whip rather than eat this sandwich.

The moral of the story is go to the gym or eat this sandwich, either way you lose weight. Gym you will build muscle, live longer, lower your blood pressure, cholesterol, etc. The Burger King option will result in violent bylemia which leads to weight loss from loss of muscle mass, fat, rotted teeth and malnutrition.

This is a public service announcement people. Do not make this mistake. Go see the movie.